Wednesday, August 30, 2017

'The Adventure' Chapter 1 Rewritten!

Hey Jammers! :D Sarahkey8 here back with another post!
You may remember, last week, I went over my fan fiction, The Adventure! You can view that post here! And today is the day I rewrite it! I'll try to keep it the same length, so don't worry XD


                                                                     Chapter 1 Velvet's New Bible
                                                                              Dove raced to Alpha Headquarters, quickly climbing up the ladder. "Dove! About time!" Ember said as she came in; "Get over here! There have been signs of Phantoms all around Jamaa." Velvet said. "I know, I know." Dove sighed.  "Where were you?" Velvet asked. "Bible study." she replied. "While Jamaa is in danger? Are you crazy!?" Ember exclaimed. "It doesn't matter, what matters is you're here now, we have to discuss what to do about the Phantoms."  said Velvet  "Where have they been spotted?" Dove asked "Around Deep Blue." Ember replied
"Deep Blue? how is that possible?! Tavie has been patrolling that area!" Dove pointed out.
"Tavie is visiting her grandmother." said Velvet "What about the others?" Dove asked "Peck and Greely have been missing. And the others.. well I don't know."  Ember said. "We need to find out where they are and-" suddenly, they have a strange and creepy laugh, The three otters spun around; they were face to face with twenty Phantoms! Dove, being quick as lighting ducked as a tentacle reached to shock her. Velvet let out a gasp as she crumpled to the floor, shocked by a Phantom. "Noo!" Ember screamed, throwing a boomseed at the Phantom who had shocked Velvet, Ember got shocked as well! Dove threw boomseed after boomseed ducking and dodging the Phantoms electricity  that came towards her.
"How come Dove is always the one who never gets shocked?" complained Ember, one again the game was interrupted by Ember complaining.  "I don't know." Dove said, shrugging. Velvet grinned. "I don't know either." she said, suddenly they heard Dove's mom from the house. "Kids! Come inside! It's time for lunch!" "Ten minutes Mrs. Otter?" Ember called back. "No, right now! Your food is going to spoil!" Ember rolled her eyes. Dove frowned at ember
"The Lord commands us to honor our parents and to obey them." Dove reminded her. "You really believe that stuff?" Velvet asked. "Yes, and you should too." Dove said. "You know its not true Velvet, Jamaa was created by Mira and Zios." Ember said crossing her arms.
"No, they founded Jamaa, the Lord created Jamaa, and Mira and Zios, and us, and everything!" Dove replied. "Now c'mon our food is getting cold!" "Its just sandwhiches." Ember muttered. And with that, they climbed down. They all took a seat around the table, and enjoyed a meal of peanutbutter and jelly sandwhiches. "Hey mom, can Ember and Velvet stay a week? Sense schools out for Summer break and all?" Dove asked.
"Its fine with me, but they will have to ask their-" "Parents. We already did!" Ember said with a grin. Mother Otter smiled "You must get your-" "Stuff! Already did! We brought it into Dove's room, we knew you would say yes." Velvet said with a grin. "Okay, I am going to take a nap,l you stay out of trouble!" she said, and went to take a nap.
"Let's go put our stuff in the treehouse!" Dove exclaimed, they ran up to her room, grabbed everything, and headed towards the treehouse. Once they set everything up,  Velvet asked a question. "Hey, uhh Dove?" Velvet asked. "Yes Velvet?" "Do you maybe have a Bible that I could borrow?" Velvet asked.  "Of course! And you can keep it too!"  She pulled out her small golden colored Bible. She handed it to Velvet, Velvet opened it to the begging and gasped. "Dove! This is from your parents!  Are you sure you want to give it to me?!" Velvet asked looking up at Dove. "You are my friend, I have another Bible at home. I want to give it to you, you need it more then me." "Wouldn't you want to give me the other one?" Velvet asked "No." "Ahem! Can't you two talk about this later? This religious stuff is nonsense anyways!" Ember exclaimed.
"Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. But I want to know." Velvet replied.
Ember shook her head. "Okay, where were we in our game?" Dove asked.  "You just got rid of all the Phantoms." Ember replied. Dove ran over to her two friends, she shook them and shook them but nothing worked. Dove looked up. "Dear God, please heal my friends, help them to wake up!" Dove prayed. Suddenly Sir Gilbert the tiger Alpha ran into Alpha Headquarters

"What happened here?" he asked. "Phantoms attacked us! The Phantoms shocked Ember and Velvet!" Dove exclaimed. "They will be alright, the Phantoms lighting of sorts just makes them fall unconscious  for a few hours." Sir Gilbert said. "About four hours by the look of it. While we wait we should call the other Alphas and plan." Sir Gilbert said. Four hours later (or ten seconds in real life) Velvet and Ember got up. "What happened?" they asked.
 "Phantoms came and attacked, they shocked you. " Sir Gilbert said. "Can't believe they would go this far." Ember mumbled. About two hours later, it was time for dinner. "You got the sandwiches?" Ember asked Dove. "Yep!" Dove grabbed her backpack and pulled out three sandwiches.  She gave on to Ember and Velvet, and had one for herself. "How much food do you have?" Ember asked. "Enough to last all of us, we'll have enough." Dove said, "Plus, me and Velvet have some." Ember said. They spread out their sleeping bags.

Hope you enjoyed! Thats all for now Jammers! Bye :D


1 comment:

  1. Cool! I look forwards to reading all of this. :D


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